first week of teaching: from wiz khalifa to out of line teachers

So, the teaching has finally begun. These past three weeks have felt the longest, but on the other hand, I still feel as though I arrived yesterday. It’s a weird mixture of feelings that I don’t think anyone could possibly comprehend! Under the impression that I was having an observation week, I turned up to my lycée on Monday very ill-prepared, only to be shoved in my own classroom with eleven teenagers. The topic? Media. That’s all I was given, media. Instead, I spent twelve hours last week ‘introducing myself’ - more like bigging myself up to some French teenagers who replied with blank, confused faces. After the first hour or two I really got the hang of it though. I’d hate to be ‘that guy girl’ but I’m gonna big myself up that little bit more; I think I’m a natural teacher. There, I said it. I never realised I could actually improvise, and there I was, standing tall and strong (but inside shaking like no one’s business) ordering scared, shy teens to speak English.

Most of the students were a piece of cake, they actually had an opinion, whether I thought it correct or not. Others, well they have already been noted as a lost cause. When I asked them what genre of music do they listen to, I merely expected a one word answer - pop/rock/rap/everything. Instead, a group of fourteen/fifteen year olds just shrugged and didn’t utter a word. There were 25 of them, and they all agreed that they hate music. “What about French music?" I asked, with which they replied “Don’t do it!" while frantically shaking their heads. Clearly they didn’t understand a word I was saying, unlike a group of secondes who absolutely LOVED to talk… and jump around… and ask awkward questions. Their reply to said question? Well it’s in the title. “I love zee wiz khalifa, ‘e singz about smoke and girlz" I was then faced with a rowdy bunch of pubescent kids who started rapping (I think) and pretending to smoke a joint. “Ev, can we speak bout zee wiz khalifa?!" I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

My favourite moment, however, was a class of terminales (17/18 year olds) who had to do a short presentation on their interests or likes. One boy decided to completely wing it and speak about his favourite thing: himself. Apparently he does this a lot, because the teacher rolled her eyes and wrote down “encore?!" (not again). I learnt all about his Martin Luther King style ‘dream’ of becoming a pro footballer, but an ‘illness in his knee’ meant he had a new dream, to become an actor ‘like that American Brad man’. What was more awkward than listening to his ‘I have a dream’ speech, was when he found himself at a loss for words to finish the sentence “I fink I can be great actor, becoz I am…." to which the teacher added “sexy?" I gasped and burst out laughing all at the same time, awkward. Fortunately, the teacher had an explanation: “NOO I said it becoz I fought that waz what ‘e waz going to say. I do not fink ‘e is sexy, no french boyz are sexy!" Seriously, dig yourself an even bigger hole. I love my job :)

Overall, a really good first week teaching. HOWEVER, I still stand by my vow never to become a teacher, but perhaps ask me again in a month or two, because these frenchies really aren’t too bad.